Taliban vs. Rednecks

I’m taking a break from City Council stuff for a few minutes. (My head is still spinning from Tuesday’s marathon meeting.)

 

Anyway…I get tons of stuff from other people. This post is a combination of a couple of items sent to me. (Sure wish I knew who wrote them so I could give the proper credit where credit is do)

All I did was combining the two for a little exercise in comparing and contrasting……..here we go…….

(With apologies to Jeff Foxworthy.)

You know you are Taliban if you..

 

refine heroin for a living & have a moral objection to beer.

 

own a $3,000 machine gun & $5,000 rocket, but can’t afford shoes.

 

wipe your butt with your bare left hand, but consider bacon unclean.

 

think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof & suicide.

 

consider TV dangerous, but carry explosives in your clothing.

 

were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses

other than setting off roadside bombs.

 

On the other hand

You might be a Redneck if: 

 

It never occurred to you to be offended by the phrase, ‘One nation, under God’.

 

You’ve never protested about seeing the 10 Commandments posted in public places.

 

You still say ‘Christmas’ instead of ‘Winter Festival.’

 

You bow your head when someone prays.

 

You stand and place your hand over your heart when they play the National Anthem…

 

You treat our armed forces veterans with great respect, and always have.

 

You’ve never burned an American flag, nor intend to.

 

You know what you believe and you aren’t afraid to say so, no matter who is listening

 

You respect your elders and raised your kids to do the same.

 

You’d give your last dollar to a friend.